1 00:00:13,392 --> 00:00:14,713 This is stupid. What are we doing here? 2 00:00:14,781 --> 00:00:15,854 We're meant to be buying Emily a gift. 3 00:00:15,921 --> 00:00:17,528 My waiting period is over. 4 00:00:17,595 --> 00:00:18,873 I thought we'd just come in here real quick and I'd buy a gun. 5 00:00:18,940 --> 00:00:19,984 Why don't you wait in the car? 6 00:00:21,229 --> 00:00:22,439 - 'Cause this interests me. - Hey! 7 00:00:22,507 --> 00:00:24,252 This interests me very much. 8 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:25,619 I'll tell you what interests me, man. 9 00:00:25,687 --> 00:00:26,926 Georgia has been very nice lately. 10 00:00:26,994 --> 00:00:28,365 She called me the other day to see 11 00:00:28,432 --> 00:00:29,809 if I wanted to have Emily for the whole weekend, 12 00:00:29,876 --> 00:00:31,685 and she was nice about it... very nice. 13 00:00:31,759 --> 00:00:34,126 Oh, maybe she wants you back. Maybe things are gonna change. 14 00:00:34,194 --> 00:00:35,835 Yeah, that's what I was thinking. 15 00:00:35,903 --> 00:00:37,610 How big do you think I should go? 16 00:00:37,678 --> 00:00:39,154 I think you should go small. 17 00:00:39,222 --> 00:00:41,325 In fact, I think you should go really small. 18 00:00:41,393 --> 00:00:42,630 I think you should go so small 19 00:00:42,697 --> 00:00:44,109 that, indeed, we can't even see it. 20 00:00:44,177 --> 00:00:45,650 Radical idea... don't even get a gun. 21 00:00:45,718 --> 00:00:47,086 You could be the guy without a gun. 22 00:00:47,153 --> 00:00:48,357 That would really throw them. 23 00:00:48,425 --> 00:00:49,965 I'm getting this for protection. 24 00:00:50,033 --> 00:00:51,842 Protection? What a stupid thing that is. 25 00:00:51,910 --> 00:00:54,052 You know, you're more likely to be shot by that gun 26 00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:55,588 than to shoot someone else. 27 00:00:55,656 --> 00:00:57,228 Oh, yeah? What about the guy with the machete? 28 00:00:57,296 --> 00:00:58,801 If I'd have had a gun that night, 29 00:00:58,874 --> 00:01:00,079 that situation would have been very different. 30 00:01:00,146 --> 00:01:01,648 Really, Steve? 31 00:01:01,715 --> 00:01:02,450 Because I remember us being stoned in our underwear, 32 00:01:02,517 --> 00:01:03,957 sitting on the couch. 33 00:01:04,025 --> 00:01:05,397 I don't remember you having a holster. 34 00:01:05,465 --> 00:01:06,940 You weren't staring at the window with a gun, 35 00:01:07,008 --> 00:01:08,776 waiting for guys with machetes to come through. 36 00:01:08,844 --> 00:01:11,347 What if... what if Emily picks this gun up and shoots herself? 37 00:01:11,415 --> 00:01:12,848 I'm gonna keep it in a safe! 38 00:01:12,914 --> 00:01:14,481 Then it's no protection! 39 00:01:14,548 --> 00:01:16,550 What happens if someone comes through the window 40 00:01:16,617 --> 00:01:18,892 with a machete and now you're like, "Wait there, dickhead. 41 00:01:18,960 --> 00:01:20,127 "Oh, yeah. 42 00:01:20,195 --> 00:01:21,895 "You've come to the wrong house here. 43 00:01:21,963 --> 00:01:24,101 "34, 56. 44 00:01:24,168 --> 00:01:25,705 Oh, I'm gonna ruin you, buddy!" 45 00:01:25,773 --> 00:01:27,542 That's good. Is that your new routine? 46 00:01:27,610 --> 00:01:28,777 It might be. Do you like it? I think it's... 47 00:01:28,844 --> 00:01:30,347 No, I don't. 48 00:01:30,415 --> 00:01:31,718 Why do you have to make fun of me 49 00:01:31,786 --> 00:01:32,655 just 'cause I'm trying to better myself? 50 00:01:32,723 --> 00:01:34,058 - Better yourself. - Yes! 51 00:01:34,125 --> 00:01:35,526 I'm finally taking control of my life. 52 00:01:35,593 --> 00:01:37,429 How is this taking control of your life? 53 00:01:37,496 --> 00:01:39,470 Jim, you know Afghanistan changed me, right? 54 00:01:39,537 --> 00:01:41,443 I mean, I-I haven't had a drink in weeks. 55 00:01:41,511 --> 00:01:42,811 I finally have a clear head. 56 00:01:42,879 --> 00:01:44,513 So now that you have a clear head, 57 00:01:44,580 --> 00:01:45,280 you want to shoot someone? 58 00:01:45,348 --> 00:01:46,816 Why don't you shut up? 59 00:01:46,884 --> 00:01:48,489 I have a constitutional right to own a gun. 60 00:01:48,556 --> 00:01:50,261 Here we go. The second amendment, right? 61 00:01:50,329 --> 00:01:51,529 The second amendment, Steve, 62 00:01:51,597 --> 00:01:53,230 was written during the time of muskets. 63 00:01:53,298 --> 00:01:55,036 Let's check if they have a musket section. 64 00:01:55,104 --> 00:01:56,774 - I didn't see many muskets. - You know what? 65 00:01:56,842 --> 00:01:58,109 You don't like it here, 66 00:01:58,177 --> 00:01:59,278 why don't you go back to Australia? 67 00:01:59,346 --> 00:02:00,581 But that's racist! 68 00:02:00,649 --> 00:02:01,483 What... what are you talking about? 69 00:02:01,551 --> 00:02:02,886 I love living here. 70 00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:04,226 I just think the second amendment is stupid. 71 00:02:04,294 --> 00:02:05,762 And by saying that, 72 00:02:05,830 --> 00:02:06,830 you're saying the constitution is stupid. 73 00:02:06,898 --> 00:02:08,267 Can I help you guys? 74 00:02:08,335 --> 00:02:09,938 Yes, my 10-day waiting period is up. 75 00:02:10,008 --> 00:02:11,477 I need to buy a gun. 76 00:02:11,545 --> 00:02:13,244 All right, well, you're in the right place. 77 00:02:13,312 --> 00:02:14,612 What are you looking for? 78 00:02:14,680 --> 00:02:16,047 Something for protection or for sport? 79 00:02:16,115 --> 00:02:18,153 - Protection, mostly. - What do you mean, "Mostly"? 80 00:02:18,220 --> 00:02:20,759 - What, are you occasionally gonna use it for sport? - Yeah, I might. 81 00:02:20,827 --> 00:02:21,994 What, you're a hunter now? 82 00:02:22,062 --> 00:02:23,966 How can you call hunting a sport? 83 00:02:24,033 --> 00:02:25,669 Sports have winners and losers. 84 00:02:25,737 --> 00:02:27,140 When have you ever lost at hunting? 85 00:02:27,208 --> 00:02:29,410 When have you come home, one of your kids is missing 86 00:02:29,478 --> 00:02:31,079 and your wife's like, "Where's Timmy?" 87 00:02:31,147 --> 00:02:32,849 And you're like, "Uh, the duck had a gun"? 88 00:02:32,917 --> 00:02:34,587 Does he need to be here? 89 00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:36,426 I ask myself that every day. 90 00:02:36,494 --> 00:02:39,532 This is a classic 9mm right there. 91 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:41,536 You should get a knife. 92 00:02:41,604 --> 00:02:43,037 He's a riot. 93 00:02:43,105 --> 00:02:44,472 Yeah, you have no idea. 94 00:02:44,540 --> 00:02:46,042 This thing is badass, man. How much? 95 00:02:46,110 --> 00:02:48,447 That one's 949 bucks. 96 00:02:48,515 --> 00:02:50,148 What do you have in the $200 range? 97 00:02:50,216 --> 00:02:54,020 $200... I have... I have this 0.22 right here. 98 00:02:54,088 --> 00:02:56,559 Oh. That's cool. Is this a good gun? 99 00:02:56,627 --> 00:02:58,394 No. 100 00:02:58,462 --> 00:02:59,995 What's your life worth to you, though? 101 00:03:00,765 --> 00:03:02,633 60 bucks. 102 00:03:02,701 --> 00:03:04,671 I have something secondhand you might like. 103 00:03:04,739 --> 00:03:07,444 Secondhand sounds about right. 104 00:03:07,512 --> 00:03:08,746 After you. 105 00:03:08,814 --> 00:03:10,147 Thank you. 106 00:03:10,215 --> 00:03:11,715 Think I should get a holster? 107 00:03:11,783 --> 00:03:13,385 I mean, it's a... it's a great purchase, right? 108 00:03:13,453 --> 00:03:15,190 It's a good-looking gun. 109 00:03:15,257 --> 00:03:16,993 Put that in your jacket! Don't keep it down your pants! 110 00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:20,667 See?! 111 00:03:20,735 --> 00:03:22,471 - Mommy! - Elaine, come back here! 112 00:03:22,538 --> 00:03:23,673 What do 9-year-old girls like? 113 00:03:23,741 --> 00:03:26,212 You know, I, uh... I have no idea. 114 00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:28,216 I know she likes the show with the bunny... 115 00:03:28,283 --> 00:03:31,555 that, uh, "Hoppinfeffer" or "Poppy"... "Hoppy Pops. " 116 00:03:31,623 --> 00:03:33,424 I don't know. It's a bunny that hops. 117 00:03:33,492 --> 00:03:34,960 I know what we should get her. 118 00:03:35,029 --> 00:03:36,631 We should get her something big. 119 00:03:36,698 --> 00:03:39,237 Something she can't take back to Cincinnati with her. 120 00:03:39,304 --> 00:03:41,940 Something she can only play with at our house. 121 00:03:42,008 --> 00:03:44,212 What, are you kidding me? 122 00:03:44,279 --> 00:03:46,080 That's 350 bucks. I can't afford that. 123 00:03:46,148 --> 00:03:47,715 I spent all my money on my gun. 124 00:03:47,783 --> 00:03:49,985 I have no idea why Georgia doesn't want you back. 125 00:03:50,054 --> 00:03:51,088 Look, I'll pay for it. 126 00:03:51,156 --> 00:03:52,623 Really? 127 00:03:52,691 --> 00:03:54,525 Yeah! 128 00:03:54,593 --> 00:03:55,994 What's the use of having protection 129 00:03:56,062 --> 00:03:58,464 if you don't have a castle to protect. 130 00:03:58,532 --> 00:03:59,598 Daddy! 131 00:03:59,666 --> 00:04:00,899 Hey, pumpkin! 132 00:04:00,967 --> 00:04:02,634 Look what just showed up in our yard! 133 00:04:02,701 --> 00:04:04,401 Is it mine? 134 00:04:04,469 --> 00:04:06,734 Well, I don't see another princess it should belong to. 135 00:04:06,802 --> 00:04:08,302 - Jim! - Hey! 136 00:04:08,370 --> 00:04:09,570 What happened to "Uncle Jim"? 137 00:04:09,638 --> 00:04:11,270 Hey! I'm the real Uncle here! 138 00:04:11,337 --> 00:04:12,670 - Uncle Billy! - Give me a hug. 139 00:04:12,738 --> 00:04:14,371 Hey, darlin'. 140 00:04:14,438 --> 00:04:17,141 Hey, guys. Nice castle. 141 00:04:17,209 --> 00:04:18,575 Where's Todd? 142 00:04:18,643 --> 00:04:19,709 Yeah, where's Todd? 143 00:04:19,777 --> 00:04:21,143 Todd's not coming today. 144 00:04:21,211 --> 00:04:22,311 Really? 145 00:04:23,814 --> 00:04:25,551 Steve, can I talk to you alone for a moment? 146 00:04:25,619 --> 00:04:27,285 Sure. Yeah, yeah. 147 00:04:27,353 --> 00:04:28,820 - Thanks. - Oh! Oh, no! 148 00:04:28,887 --> 00:04:30,721 I've got a barnacle on me leg! 149 00:04:30,788 --> 00:04:32,223 Come on. 150 00:04:32,290 --> 00:04:34,691 I got to go talk to mom for a second, all right? 151 00:04:34,759 --> 00:04:35,692 Do you like it? 152 00:04:35,759 --> 00:04:36,658 I love it! 153 00:04:36,726 --> 00:04:39,263 Don't go in that bit. 154 00:04:39,331 --> 00:04:40,763 Look, before you say anything, 155 00:04:40,831 --> 00:04:42,697 I just want to tell you I know I'm late on the money 156 00:04:42,765 --> 00:04:44,098 and I'm really sorry about that, 157 00:04:44,166 --> 00:04:45,633 but I got a couple irons in the fire, 158 00:04:45,701 --> 00:04:47,337 so everything's gonna be good, you know? 159 00:04:47,405 --> 00:04:51,504 Look, Steve. I didn't come to talk to you about that. 160 00:04:51,572 --> 00:04:53,742 Oh, God. This is harder than I thought. 161 00:04:53,809 --> 00:04:55,676 Oh, no. You and Todd having trouble? 162 00:04:55,744 --> 00:04:56,943 Oh, no. 163 00:04:57,011 --> 00:04:59,045 Well, you can tell me. 164 00:04:59,113 --> 00:05:01,950 Look, I can see that you have made a lot of changes, 165 00:05:02,018 --> 00:05:03,551 and I'm so happy for you. 166 00:05:03,619 --> 00:05:04,918 Oh, thanks. Yeah. 167 00:05:04,985 --> 00:05:06,552 I can tell you're not drinking as much. 168 00:05:06,619 --> 00:05:08,287 Nope. Three weeks. 169 00:05:08,355 --> 00:05:11,226 And I know I never say this, 170 00:05:11,294 --> 00:05:13,064 but you really are a good dad to Em. 171 00:05:13,132 --> 00:05:15,000 Yeah, that means a lot. Thank you. 172 00:05:15,068 --> 00:05:16,669 Mm-hmm. 173 00:05:16,736 --> 00:05:17,703 I know. You know, things are gonna be different around here now. 174 00:05:17,771 --> 00:05:19,371 I promise. 175 00:05:19,439 --> 00:05:21,008 And I want you to know that you don't have to worry 176 00:05:21,077 --> 00:05:22,244 about the money anymore. 177 00:05:22,311 --> 00:05:23,811 No, I'm gonna fix that. I swear. 178 00:05:23,879 --> 00:05:26,047 Georgia, don't worry about that. Please. I swear to you. 179 00:05:26,115 --> 00:05:27,650 - I'll take care... - Okay, look. I'm just gonna come out and say it, okay? 180 00:05:27,718 --> 00:05:29,720 - All right. - Okay. 181 00:05:29,787 --> 00:05:33,457 Um, Todd and I are getting married and I'm pregnant. 182 00:05:40,533 --> 00:05:42,168 Wow. 183 00:05:42,236 --> 00:05:45,137 Yeah, and Emily's gonna have a little brother or sister. 184 00:05:45,205 --> 00:05:48,172 That's awesome. 185 00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:50,608 Because y... um... 186 00:05:52,279 --> 00:05:53,813 Yeah. 187 00:05:55,394 --> 00:05:57,160 When the baby comes, I hope it's a girl. 188 00:05:57,228 --> 00:05:58,629 No, I hope it's a boy. 189 00:05:58,697 --> 00:06:00,964 No! I don't know what I want. 190 00:06:01,032 --> 00:06:02,734 I'm just too excited. 191 00:06:02,802 --> 00:06:04,869 Are you excited, too, daddy? 192 00:06:04,937 --> 00:06:06,137 Oh, yeah. 193 00:06:06,205 --> 00:06:07,639 That's really exciting, you know? 194 00:06:07,707 --> 00:06:09,138 You're gonna be a big sister! 195 00:06:09,206 --> 00:06:11,707 Okay, come down here. Say goodbye to me. 196 00:06:13,709 --> 00:06:16,709 Mm! 197 00:06:16,776 --> 00:06:18,144 And I'll be back tomorrow. 198 00:06:18,212 --> 00:06:19,279 - Okay. - I love you. 199 00:06:19,347 --> 00:06:20,515 - Love you. - Bye, Jim. 200 00:06:20,583 --> 00:06:21,483 Bye. 201 00:06:21,551 --> 00:06:23,018 Thanks, Steve. 202 00:06:23,086 --> 00:06:24,820 Sure. Have fun in Santa Barbara. 203 00:06:24,887 --> 00:06:26,621 Say hi to your mom and dad for me. 204 00:06:26,689 --> 00:06:27,522 Okay. 205 00:06:29,523 --> 00:06:31,557 Are you okay, Steve? 206 00:06:33,495 --> 00:06:36,164 Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just gonna go... out. 207 00:06:36,232 --> 00:06:37,898 Clear my head a little bit. 208 00:06:37,966 --> 00:06:40,101 Hey, Em, you okay being with Uncle Jim and Uncle Billy 209 00:06:40,169 --> 00:06:43,737 - for a little bit? - Yes! 210 00:06:43,805 --> 00:06:45,441 - You sure you're all right? - Yeah, eh. 211 00:06:50,581 --> 00:06:51,880 Dah! 212 00:06:51,947 --> 00:06:54,084 I'm out of bullets, man! I need more! 213 00:06:54,152 --> 00:06:56,022 Sorry, buddy. We're closing up. 214 00:06:56,090 --> 00:06:57,691 You know, I bet I'd be a better shot 215 00:06:57,758 --> 00:06:59,992 if you could put my ex-wife's picture on that target. 216 00:07:00,060 --> 00:07:02,696 Yeah, Obama made that illegal. But I hear you, man. 217 00:07:02,765 --> 00:07:04,732 I got a couple ex-wives. 218 00:07:04,798 --> 00:07:07,365 - What the hell? - Last box on me. 219 00:07:07,433 --> 00:07:08,667 Thank you. 220 00:07:08,735 --> 00:07:10,836 Your chariot awaits, Princess! 221 00:07:10,904 --> 00:07:12,005 What is the password? 222 00:07:13,408 --> 00:07:17,477 What is the passw... 223 00:07:17,545 --> 00:07:22,081 Life isn't worth living if Jim doesn't date me anymore! 224 00:07:23,683 --> 00:07:25,183 I've already cut myself! 225 00:07:25,250 --> 00:07:27,218 Jim! 226 00:07:27,286 --> 00:07:28,786 She's a little girl! 227 00:07:29,922 --> 00:07:31,255 - Yeah! - Nice shooting. 228 00:07:31,323 --> 00:07:34,392 All right! Nice! 229 00:07:34,460 --> 00:07:35,826 Hey, you want to have a drink? 230 00:07:35,894 --> 00:07:37,093 - Yeah. - What?! 231 00:07:37,161 --> 00:07:38,294 - Yes! - Oh. 232 00:07:38,362 --> 00:07:39,696 Play inside. Come on. Get on my back. 233 00:07:39,763 --> 00:07:41,564 All right. 234 00:07:41,632 --> 00:07:43,433 When's daddy coming back? 235 00:07:43,500 --> 00:07:44,801 Soon. 236 00:07:44,869 --> 00:07:49,106 It's been a long time. Where did he go? 237 00:07:49,174 --> 00:07:50,539 Work. 238 00:07:50,607 --> 00:07:52,239 Now that dick, Todd, knocked her up. 239 00:07:52,307 --> 00:07:53,842 She's pregnant. 240 00:07:53,910 --> 00:07:55,611 I bet that bitch won't even let you see your own kid. 241 00:07:55,679 --> 00:07:57,380 No, I see her a couple times a year. 242 00:07:57,448 --> 00:07:58,913 I'm in the same boat, buddy. 243 00:07:58,981 --> 00:08:00,380 She's at my house right now. 244 00:08:00,448 --> 00:08:02,015 I haven't seen my kids in years. 245 00:08:02,083 --> 00:08:04,219 My ex-wife says I can't. 246 00:08:04,287 --> 00:08:06,523 She says I can't have plastic explosives in the house 247 00:08:06,591 --> 00:08:08,124 because it's dangerous. 248 00:08:08,192 --> 00:08:09,625 Well, if there's kids there, that is dangerous. 249 00:08:09,693 --> 00:08:12,223 Hello! It's for their protection. 250 00:08:12,291 --> 00:08:14,326 From the government, right? 251 00:08:14,394 --> 00:08:15,328 Yeah. 252 00:08:22,129 --> 00:08:25,366 I just want to see Obama try and knock on my door. 253 00:08:25,434 --> 00:08:28,567 I don't like this movie. 254 00:08:28,634 --> 00:08:31,001 What time do you go to bed? 255 00:08:31,069 --> 00:08:32,435 11:00. 256 00:08:32,503 --> 00:08:34,037 That's like two hours. 257 00:08:34,104 --> 00:08:37,241 She doesn't go to bed at 11:00. You go to bed at 9:00. 258 00:08:37,308 --> 00:08:39,510 All right, good night, Em. 259 00:08:39,578 --> 00:08:41,746 I need a story. 260 00:08:41,814 --> 00:08:42,782 Do I have to? 261 00:08:42,850 --> 00:08:44,252 All right, come on. 262 00:08:44,319 --> 00:08:47,389 Um, there once was a little girl... 263 00:08:47,457 --> 00:08:49,256 Was she a princess? 264 00:08:49,324 --> 00:08:51,489 Uh, sure. Why not? Yeah, she was a princess. 265 00:08:51,557 --> 00:08:53,658 Her name was Emily. 266 00:08:53,727 --> 00:08:56,264 That's my name. I want a different princess. 267 00:08:56,331 --> 00:08:58,232 Okay, her name was Amber. 268 00:08:59,333 --> 00:09:01,733 I got to go find a bed. 269 00:09:03,903 --> 00:09:06,873 I, too, must find a bed, Gene! 270 00:09:06,941 --> 00:09:09,210 After one more. 271 00:09:12,848 --> 00:09:14,415 Where the hell have you been? 272 00:09:14,483 --> 00:09:15,817 What's up, guys? What are you doing? 273 00:09:15,885 --> 00:09:17,520 Taking care of your kid. 274 00:09:17,588 --> 00:09:19,525 - Em! Emily! - Hey! Shut up! 275 00:09:19,593 --> 00:09:21,228 - Shh! - Shut up, all right? She's in bed. 276 00:09:21,296 --> 00:09:22,495 You shut up. Emily! 277 00:09:22,563 --> 00:09:23,960 All right, you're too drunk. 278 00:09:24,028 --> 00:09:25,963 I'm too drunk. Okay. 279 00:09:26,031 --> 00:09:27,767 - Steve. - Do you hear this, Billy? 280 00:09:27,835 --> 00:09:30,404 Jim Jefferies is telling me that I'm too drunk. 281 00:09:30,471 --> 00:09:32,239 Man, that... that's like 282 00:09:32,307 --> 00:09:35,679 some kind of crackhead telling a crackhead 283 00:09:35,747 --> 00:09:37,414 that he's got crack problems. 284 00:09:37,482 --> 00:09:38,382 All right, go to bed. 285 00:09:38,449 --> 00:09:39,583 Daddy? 286 00:09:39,650 --> 00:09:41,051 Hey, Em! 287 00:09:41,119 --> 00:09:42,152 No, no. You don't want to do this. 288 00:09:42,220 --> 00:09:43,520 Hey, honey. 289 00:09:43,588 --> 00:09:45,456 Honey, uh, the adults are talking. 290 00:09:45,524 --> 00:09:46,591 Hop on and I'll take you back to bed. 291 00:09:46,659 --> 00:09:47,959 Emily! 292 00:09:48,027 --> 00:09:48,860 Look, I know you've had a really shitty day, 293 00:09:48,928 --> 00:09:50,494 but this proves nothing. 294 00:09:50,562 --> 00:09:53,363 All right, go to bed, wake up, and start again. 295 00:09:53,431 --> 00:09:56,466 - Get your hands... - Steve, do you want to lose the last thing you've got? 296 00:09:56,534 --> 00:09:57,866 Least I got something to lose. 297 00:09:57,934 --> 00:09:59,701 - What does that mean? - You know what it means. 298 00:09:59,769 --> 00:10:01,303 Well, you're not part of this family. 299 00:10:01,371 --> 00:10:03,438 You're just some dickhead that hangs around all the time. 300 00:10:03,506 --> 00:10:04,774 I got a kid to lose and you don't 301 00:10:04,842 --> 00:10:06,778 'cause you aborted it when you were 16. 302 00:10:06,846 --> 00:10:10,353 Oh! You stupid piece of shit! 303 00:10:10,420 --> 00:10:11,988 - What happened? - I don't know. 304 00:10:12,055 --> 00:10:13,423 Wow! 305 00:10:13,491 --> 00:10:16,060 Turns out someone can dish out the jokes 306 00:10:16,128 --> 00:10:17,927 but they can't take 'em! 307 00:10:22,862 --> 00:10:23,996 I shouldn't have hit him. 308 00:10:24,063 --> 00:10:26,769 No, no, Jim. He deserved it. 309 00:10:26,837 --> 00:10:28,538 Yeah, but Emily's here, 310 00:10:28,605 --> 00:10:29,871 and I should have gone after him. 311 00:10:29,939 --> 00:10:31,508 Nah. He's probably just walking it off. 312 00:10:31,576 --> 00:10:33,077 He'll be okay. 313 00:10:40,954 --> 00:10:43,823 more than one man need 314 00:10:43,891 --> 00:10:45,293 I'm thirsty. 315 00:10:45,360 --> 00:10:48,929 Hey, dude. It's Steve. Listen, man. 316 00:10:48,997 --> 00:10:51,466 I know we both said a lot of things in there we didn't mean. 317 00:10:51,533 --> 00:10:53,568 But you didn't have to hit me. You know that. 318 00:10:53,636 --> 00:10:55,837 Anyway, I just wanted to call, man. 319 00:10:55,904 --> 00:10:57,570 But you're not answering, 320 00:10:57,637 --> 00:10:59,872 so I have to assume that you're probably pissed at me. 321 00:10:59,940 --> 00:11:04,008 Bottoms up. Here we go. One, two, three. 322 00:11:04,076 --> 00:11:05,209 Yeah! 323 00:11:05,277 --> 00:11:06,611 Oh, no. Who wants another? 324 00:11:06,679 --> 00:11:08,013 We'll do another. 325 00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:09,848 Hey, come on. Pack it up, man. 326 00:11:09,916 --> 00:11:11,183 - Hello? - Time to go. 327 00:11:11,251 --> 00:11:13,254 I'm gonna pack it in your rear end! 328 00:11:16,289 --> 00:11:18,223 Whoo! 329 00:11:18,290 --> 00:11:19,458 You're a dick! 330 00:11:19,526 --> 00:11:20,860 Is this crack? 331 00:11:20,928 --> 00:11:23,429 Hey, who else has a gun? Raise your hand? 332 00:11:23,497 --> 00:11:24,363 No shit! 333 00:11:26,833 --> 00:11:30,234 Oh, shit! 334 00:11:30,302 --> 00:11:32,003 Now I know why people suck dick for this stuff. 335 00:11:32,071 --> 00:11:33,070 This is good. 336 00:11:33,137 --> 00:11:34,835 I am sorry. 337 00:11:34,903 --> 00:11:38,500 Don't tell Georgia that this all happened, okay? 338 00:11:38,568 --> 00:11:39,969 - I say we go to a cockfight. - Hold on. 339 00:11:40,036 --> 00:11:41,271 What? 340 00:11:41,338 --> 00:11:42,739 Yeah, man. Let's go to a cockfight. 341 00:11:42,807 --> 00:11:44,107 Hey, who's in charge? 342 00:11:44,175 --> 00:11:45,275 I am. 343 00:11:45,343 --> 00:11:47,007 You want some action on the cocks? 344 00:11:47,075 --> 00:11:48,809 Billy, what the hell are you doing here? 345 00:11:48,877 --> 00:11:51,978 My name's not Billy. My name's Big Pete. 346 00:11:52,046 --> 00:11:53,681 Want action or not? 347 00:11:53,749 --> 00:11:55,017 What kind of cockfight is it, anyway? 348 00:11:55,085 --> 00:11:56,618 There's no Mexicans here. 349 00:11:56,685 --> 00:11:59,852 I want to put $40 on the blue one. 350 00:11:59,919 --> 00:12:02,356 Come on, blue! Come on, blue! Come on, baby! 351 00:12:02,425 --> 00:12:03,893 Yeah! 352 00:12:03,961 --> 00:12:07,027 Fight like my brother, you stupid chicken! 353 00:12:07,095 --> 00:12:09,498 I just realized who you are. 354 00:12:09,566 --> 00:12:13,403 You're the guy that started Hustler magazine, right? 355 00:12:13,471 --> 00:12:16,072 Get spoon face out of here. 356 00:12:16,140 --> 00:12:17,273 Okay. All right, all right. 357 00:12:17,341 --> 00:12:20,243 Oh! Oh! 358 00:12:20,310 --> 00:12:23,313 That one... it's snowing in booger town, people! 359 00:12:23,380 --> 00:12:24,447 Booby line. 360 00:12:30,521 --> 00:12:32,423 Best night ever! 361 00:12:32,491 --> 00:12:33,892 Ooh. I got dizzy all of a sudden. 362 00:12:35,093 --> 00:12:36,359 Uh... 363 00:12:47,339 --> 00:12:48,975 What?! 364 00:12:49,043 --> 00:12:52,280 Shit! Shit! Shit! 365 00:12:52,347 --> 00:12:54,851 Oh, shit! Oh, shit! 366 00:13:03,399 --> 00:13:05,066 Where's my phone? 367 00:13:05,134 --> 00:13:08,372 Where's my gun? 368 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:09,841 Get up! 369 00:13:11,277 --> 00:13:11,977 Get up, get up, get up, get up. 370 00:13:12,044 --> 00:13:13,446 Wait. What? 371 00:13:13,513 --> 00:13:14,814 Get up! Get up! 372 00:13:14,882 --> 00:13:16,917 Come on, Princess. Go back to bed. 373 00:13:16,985 --> 00:13:18,417 No! Get up! 374 00:13:18,485 --> 00:13:20,651 Go see your daddy. He'll help you out. 375 00:13:20,719 --> 00:13:24,157 Dad's not here and Uncle Billy needs help, so get up! 376 00:13:24,225 --> 00:13:25,792 Hey! 377 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:27,692 Come on, come on, come on! 378 00:13:29,828 --> 00:13:31,428 Have you been playing all night? 379 00:13:31,496 --> 00:13:33,964 Yes. I need to pee. 380 00:13:37,301 --> 00:13:39,403 So, Steve didn't come home. 381 00:13:39,471 --> 00:13:40,437 Nope. 382 00:13:40,505 --> 00:13:43,538 Perfect. 383 00:13:45,440 --> 00:13:46,373 What's your name? 384 00:13:46,440 --> 00:13:47,640 Billy. 385 00:13:47,708 --> 00:13:48,908 No, it's not. It's Belinda. 386 00:13:48,976 --> 00:13:50,243 - Okay. - What's your name? 387 00:13:50,310 --> 00:13:51,977 Jemima? 388 00:13:52,045 --> 00:13:53,445 No, it's Sally. 389 00:13:53,513 --> 00:13:55,916 That doesn't make any sense. 390 00:13:55,984 --> 00:13:59,156 Sally, you are my maid. You have to cook me food. 391 00:13:59,224 --> 00:14:02,559 Belinda, you're my driver. You have to drive me around. 392 00:14:02,626 --> 00:14:05,061 Okay. Hop on board, Princess Emily. 393 00:14:05,128 --> 00:14:06,362 Where would you like to go? 394 00:14:06,432 --> 00:14:08,167 To Sally's restaurant to eat, please. 395 00:14:08,235 --> 00:14:10,467 - What? I'm a maid that has a restaurant? - Yes. 396 00:14:10,535 --> 00:14:13,035 - Where is Sally's restaurant? - In the kitchen, silly. 397 00:14:13,103 --> 00:14:14,471 I'm an idiot. Of course. 398 00:14:14,539 --> 00:14:15,773 Uh... 399 00:14:15,841 --> 00:14:18,275 Ah, cereal. Okay. 400 00:14:19,578 --> 00:14:21,379 Oh shit. Jim! 401 00:14:21,447 --> 00:14:23,816 We were going up the ramp and she fell off. 402 00:14:23,883 --> 00:14:26,084 I want my mommy! 403 00:14:26,151 --> 00:14:28,487 Okay, your dad's gonna be here real soon. 404 00:14:28,555 --> 00:14:30,189 - You keep saying that! - All right, okay. 405 00:14:30,256 --> 00:14:31,855 - Okay, give me a look here. - I'm sorry. 406 00:14:31,923 --> 00:14:34,654 That is just a little, tiny scratch, okay? 407 00:14:34,722 --> 00:14:35,988 Okay. Good. 408 00:14:36,055 --> 00:14:37,422 It's a big freakin' cut! 409 00:14:37,490 --> 00:14:40,126 I want my daddy! 410 00:14:40,161 --> 00:14:41,747 You're gonna be fine! 411 00:14:43,065 --> 00:14:46,032 Okay, if you could um just fill this out with your insurance. 412 00:14:46,100 --> 00:14:48,769 All right. Um, now, I have medical insurance. 413 00:14:48,837 --> 00:14:50,505 I'm not sure what the girl's medical insurance... 414 00:14:50,573 --> 00:14:51,738 She can go on my medical insurance. 415 00:14:51,806 --> 00:14:53,005 - Are you the father? - No. 416 00:14:53,072 --> 00:14:54,640 Are you related? 417 00:14:54,708 --> 00:14:56,275 America. All right. Fine. 418 00:14:56,343 --> 00:14:58,607 I'll pay in cash. It's no big deal. 419 00:14:58,674 --> 00:14:59,906 Why are you with this child? 420 00:14:59,974 --> 00:15:01,173 Okay, this girl needs stitches. 421 00:15:01,240 --> 00:15:02,373 - What?! - You need stitches! 422 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:03,841 She needs stitches. 423 00:15:03,908 --> 00:15:05,010 I- if you could just give me a minute. 424 00:15:05,077 --> 00:15:06,078 I- I need to talk to someone else. 425 00:15:06,146 --> 00:15:07,046 - Jim? - Please... 426 00:15:07,114 --> 00:15:08,314 Katie? 427 00:15:08,382 --> 00:15:10,313 It's okay. Um, I know him. 428 00:15:10,381 --> 00:15:12,216 This is Steve and Georgia's daughter, Emily. 429 00:15:12,284 --> 00:15:13,719 I just got to get her fixed up 430 00:15:13,787 --> 00:15:15,154 before either of them get back. 431 00:15:15,222 --> 00:15:16,588 Where are they? 432 00:15:16,655 --> 00:15:19,454 Well, Georgia is in Santa Barbara and Steve... 433 00:15:19,522 --> 00:15:20,788 My dad's at work. 434 00:15:20,856 --> 00:15:22,456 - Is at work. - Oh. 435 00:15:24,459 --> 00:15:27,658 Hey! Hey! Hoppin' Boppin'! 436 00:15:27,726 --> 00:15:29,795 Hoppin'! Oh, my God! 437 00:15:29,863 --> 00:15:32,399 Hey, you sick bastard! A kid died there! 438 00:15:32,467 --> 00:15:34,135 Screw you! 439 00:15:34,203 --> 00:15:36,206 How do you know I'm not putting it up, you asshole?! 440 00:15:36,273 --> 00:15:39,312 Son of a bitch. 441 00:15:39,380 --> 00:15:40,748 You're not gonna need stitches. 442 00:15:40,816 --> 00:15:42,250 See? I told you. 443 00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:44,017 Yeah, just a couple butterfly bandages, 444 00:15:44,085 --> 00:15:45,885 and you might have a tiny scar. 445 00:15:45,953 --> 00:15:48,454 Ah, scars are good! Scars make you look tough. 446 00:15:48,521 --> 00:15:51,389 - Scars give your face character. - Girls don't like that. 447 00:15:51,457 --> 00:15:52,653 - They don't like to have character, girls? - No. 448 00:15:52,721 --> 00:15:54,488 I wouldn't have picked that. Seems odd. 449 00:15:55,924 --> 00:15:58,294 Katie, why are you here? 450 00:15:58,362 --> 00:16:00,933 Um, actually, we moved here a couple years ago 451 00:16:01,001 --> 00:16:02,535 to be close to my parents. 452 00:16:02,602 --> 00:16:04,778 But at the reunion, you said you were living in Sacramento. 453 00:16:05,972 --> 00:16:09,006 Yeah. Um, I didn't want to complicate things. 454 00:16:09,074 --> 00:16:11,574 Ah. 455 00:16:11,641 --> 00:16:16,344 All right. Well, it looks like we are done. 456 00:16:16,412 --> 00:16:17,779 Thank you. 457 00:16:17,847 --> 00:16:20,312 You're welcome. Good to see you, Jim. 458 00:16:20,380 --> 00:16:22,111 - You too. - Beautiful makeup, by the way. 459 00:16:22,179 --> 00:16:24,146 I... Why didn't you tell me I still had makeup? 460 00:16:25,150 --> 00:16:27,116 I really like her. 461 00:16:27,184 --> 00:16:28,950 Me too. 462 00:16:29,018 --> 00:16:30,252 She really likes you. 463 00:16:37,832 --> 00:16:39,132 I think what I want to do 464 00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:40,533 is I want to have the ceremony at the church, 465 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:41,867 and I definitely want to have the reception 466 00:16:41,935 --> 00:16:43,202 - at the Four Seasons. - Four Seasons. 467 00:16:43,270 --> 00:16:45,005 But this is the last one, right? 468 00:16:45,073 --> 00:16:46,372 Oh, Harold. 469 00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:47,406 It'll be the last one. I promise. 470 00:16:47,473 --> 00:16:48,139 Oh, my God. 471 00:16:48,207 --> 00:16:49,805 Look at that guy. 472 00:16:49,873 --> 00:16:51,707 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 473 00:16:51,775 --> 00:16:53,943 Oh, no! Oh... 474 00:16:54,011 --> 00:16:56,011 Ohh. Is that Steve? 475 00:16:56,078 --> 00:16:57,846 My God! 476 00:16:57,914 --> 00:16:59,381 God, I've always hated him. 477 00:16:59,449 --> 00:17:03,020 Steve! Oh, my God! 478 00:17:03,087 --> 00:17:04,755 Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Handler. 479 00:17:04,823 --> 00:17:06,256 Oh, my God. 480 00:17:09,090 --> 00:17:10,589 Hey, Steve. 481 00:17:10,657 --> 00:17:13,729 Hi. How was Santa Barbara? 482 00:17:13,797 --> 00:17:15,231 - Great. - Oh, shut up, Todd! 483 00:17:15,299 --> 00:17:19,066 What are you doing out here? 484 00:17:19,134 --> 00:17:20,567 Oh, just a second. 485 00:17:26,207 --> 00:17:27,474 Sorry. 486 00:17:27,541 --> 00:17:29,243 Let me get in. I'll explain. 487 00:17:29,310 --> 00:17:32,013 - Oh, no. No. No, no. - No. No. 488 00:17:32,081 --> 00:17:34,247 Can we watch "Despicable Me" or something? 489 00:17:34,314 --> 00:17:36,516 I am bored out of my mind. I hate video games! 490 00:17:36,584 --> 00:17:37,585 No. 491 00:17:37,653 --> 00:17:38,819 Pbht. 492 00:17:38,887 --> 00:17:39,919 Daddy's home! 493 00:17:43,921 --> 00:17:45,022 Hi, Emily. 494 00:17:45,090 --> 00:17:46,224 Katie Knox. 495 00:17:46,292 --> 00:17:48,763 Hi. How did you find us? 496 00:17:48,831 --> 00:17:52,299 Oh, I've... I've been here before. 497 00:17:52,367 --> 00:17:54,938 Hey. I just, um, wanted to stop by 498 00:17:55,006 --> 00:17:57,174 and see how Emily was doing. 499 00:17:57,242 --> 00:17:58,475 Do you want to see my castle? 500 00:17:58,543 --> 00:17:59,810 I do! 501 00:17:59,878 --> 00:18:01,045 Em, don't do... Don't run. 502 00:18:01,113 --> 00:18:02,980 You'll trip o... 503 00:18:03,048 --> 00:18:04,414 What's going on? 504 00:18:04,482 --> 00:18:06,584 Well, Georgia should be back at any minute, 505 00:18:06,652 --> 00:18:09,387 and as for Steve, who the hell knows where Steve is? 506 00:18:09,455 --> 00:18:10,952 He's not at work? 507 00:18:11,020 --> 00:18:12,884 No, Steve doesn't work. 508 00:18:12,951 --> 00:18:14,384 Georgia is pregnant. 509 00:18:14,451 --> 00:18:17,053 Steve freaked out and went out on a bender. 510 00:18:19,087 --> 00:18:21,388 God, how does he do this? He ruins everything! 511 00:18:21,456 --> 00:18:22,957 - What is that smell? - Everything! 512 00:18:24,661 --> 00:18:26,329 Where's Em? 513 00:18:26,397 --> 00:18:28,995 She's at home. She should be fine. 514 00:18:29,062 --> 00:18:30,596 See? This is my castle. 515 00:18:30,664 --> 00:18:32,699 Wow! That is a great castle. 516 00:18:32,767 --> 00:18:34,866 I want one. Where'd you get it? 517 00:18:34,934 --> 00:18:37,368 Uncle Jim and Uncle Billy got it for me. 518 00:18:37,436 --> 00:18:38,971 That's not true. Your dad got you that castle. 519 00:18:39,039 --> 00:18:41,538 Then why didn't he stay and play Princess with me? 520 00:18:41,606 --> 00:18:43,642 Come here. 521 00:18:43,709 --> 00:18:45,211 No. 522 00:18:45,279 --> 00:18:46,413 Come on! Come here. 523 00:18:46,481 --> 00:18:48,479 Fine! 524 00:18:50,750 --> 00:18:51,917 Looking good, Steve. 525 00:18:51,985 --> 00:18:53,251 Shut up, Todd. 526 00:18:54,988 --> 00:18:58,261 Now, your daddy really wanted to be with you this weekend. 527 00:18:58,329 --> 00:18:59,999 But he couldn't 528 00:19:00,067 --> 00:19:01,901 'cause he's working really, really hard at the moment, 529 00:19:01,969 --> 00:19:03,235 and so he made sure that me and Uncle Billy 530 00:19:03,303 --> 00:19:04,668 were here to play with you. 531 00:19:04,736 --> 00:19:07,005 Yeah, I'm sure if he could be here, he would be. 532 00:19:07,072 --> 00:19:10,776 Why does my dad get drunk? 533 00:19:13,045 --> 00:19:18,019 Um... 534 00:19:18,087 --> 00:19:21,421 Your... your dad gets, um... 535 00:19:21,489 --> 00:19:23,289 Okay, you know when you're spinning around 536 00:19:23,357 --> 00:19:25,260 and you're spinning and you're spinning and you're spinning? 537 00:19:25,328 --> 00:19:26,929 Mm-hmm. 538 00:19:26,996 --> 00:19:28,563 And we tell you not to do it but you do it anyway, 539 00:19:28,630 --> 00:19:29,497 and then you fall on the ground, and you're really dizzy, 540 00:19:29,565 --> 00:19:30,499 and you can't get back up? 541 00:19:30,567 --> 00:19:31,801 Yeah. 542 00:19:31,869 --> 00:19:33,234 That's why your dad drinks. 543 00:19:35,136 --> 00:19:37,270 Why doesn't he just spin around? 544 00:19:37,338 --> 00:19:40,570 Um, sometimes adults have so much... 545 00:19:40,638 --> 00:19:43,843 You know what? That's a really good question. 546 00:19:46,214 --> 00:19:47,847 Hmm. Do you want to spin around? 547 00:19:47,914 --> 00:19:49,548 I don't know. Do I? 548 00:19:49,616 --> 00:19:51,617 - Yes. - Yeah. 549 00:19:51,685 --> 00:19:52,818 Yes, I do. 550 00:19:52,886 --> 00:19:54,353 Whoo-hoo! Let's go! 551 00:19:54,421 --> 00:19:56,288 Let's go, let's go, let's go! 552 00:19:56,356 --> 00:19:58,822 Jim, you handled that really well. 553 00:19:58,889 --> 00:20:00,257 Good save. 554 00:20:00,324 --> 00:20:02,461 We would have made a good team. 555 00:20:02,529 --> 00:20:04,697 Whoever's last wins. Go! 556 00:20:04,765 --> 00:20:05,764 Whooooo! 557 00:20:05,832 --> 00:20:07,597 558 00:20:07,665 --> 00:20:09,667 559 00:20:10,903 --> 00:20:13,273 Whoooooo! 560 00:20:14,473 --> 00:20:16,008 I win! 561 00:20:16,076 --> 00:20:18,478 Is there any winners in this game, really? 562 00:20:18,545 --> 00:20:20,212 Yes! 563 00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:21,779 All right, just pull over. 564 00:20:21,847 --> 00:20:24,246 I'll jump out and I'll get her. 565 00:20:24,314 --> 00:20:26,215 You want a hand, sweetie? 566 00:20:26,283 --> 00:20:27,183 Shut up, Todd. 567 00:20:27,251 --> 00:20:29,419 Okay. 568 00:20:29,487 --> 00:20:30,720 See you later, Steve. 569 00:20:30,788 --> 00:20:32,287 Thanks for the ride, dick. 570 00:20:32,355 --> 00:20:34,688 Yep. Any time. 571 00:20:34,756 --> 00:20:36,124 You ready? 572 00:20:36,191 --> 00:20:37,326 Mm-hmm. 573 00:20:37,393 --> 00:20:39,662 Just keep walking. 574 00:20:39,730 --> 00:20:40,895 Hoppin' Boppin'! 575 00:20:40,963 --> 00:20:42,930 - Don't touch the bunny. - Okay. 576 00:20:42,998 --> 00:20:43,832 Bye, kiddo. Love you. 577 00:20:43,900 --> 00:20:44,802 I love you. 578 00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:46,604 Yeah, I love you, too. 579 00:20:46,672 --> 00:20:49,608 Did you at least have fun? 580 00:20:49,676 --> 00:20:51,510 Oh, shit. 581 00:20:51,578 --> 00:20:52,945 - What? - I lost my gun. 582 00:21:00,087 --> 00:21:02,286 Bye. 583 00:21:05,059 --> 00:21:08,297 Hope you have a miscarriage.